A Single Girl Surrounded by Newlyweds and Newborns

I always hesitate to complain about the fact that most of my friends have gotten married and are starting to have (or talk about having) babies. No matter what I say or how I put it, some of you are going to think that I'm just jealous. Well maybe I am... but probably not in the way you suspect.

I've put a lot of thought into this lately. I'm 26 and single. But a little over a year ago I was 25 and on my way to the altar... or I least I thought I was. My bf J. and I had been together for about 4 years, and known each other since jr. high. I guess I was so caught up in my white-dress-followed-by-white-picket-fence kinda dream, that I lost track of the fact that J. was not my prince on a white horse. We had a cute enough story on paper... But in reality I had decided to settle. And eventually the relationship began to wear on both of us.

In the meantime most of my friends saw their white dress dreams come true. (And I hope with all of my heart that they weren't settling... however, I'll leave this topic for another day.) Now that they've celebrated 1st and 2nd anniversaries, the topic of conversation has moved onto babies. And the first of them is due in September. And yes its exciting. I was more than happy to volunteer to help with the baby shower. I bought decorations, sent a hundred emails, baked a zillion cookies (and frosted them, too). The shower was a blast... until the other guests left and I found myself with 4 of my closest friends. It should have been a great time for girl talk. It'd been forever since we'd all been together and had the chance to just sit and talk. But I soon found out that not only was I the only unmarried friend, but now I'd become the only one not baby-planning. So I sat, and listened to them talk about too short maternity leaves, and whether or not their mother-in-laws will be allowed to babysit. But what could I contribute to the conversation? Oh I tried... But I guess what hurt the most was that no one seemed curious about what my life is like, or what my plans are... And I wasn't going to interrupt baby-talk with a story about my latest internet dating dilema. I guess I'll save those stories for someone who cares.

So yeah it sucked when my friends only wanted to talk about weddings, and it sucks now that they only want to talk about babies. And I'll admit... I'm jealous. I'm jealous that they get to go through these things together, and I'm jealous that they have each other to talk to. But I can't say that I'm jealous that they're having babies or even that their married. Being 26 and single isnt so bad after all... While they're changing diapers I can still be out having drinks. Diaper changing can wait... I just wish they'd feel the same way.

not so stupid stupidest things

I've done 88 out of the 122 not so stupid stupidest things

() Smoked A Cigarette - but lately its been tempting
() Smoked A Cigar
() Kissed A Member Of The Same Sex

SO FAR: 0

(x) Are / Been In Love
(x) dumped someone
(x) Shoplifted
( ) Been Fired
(x) Been In A Fist Fight - when we were little my brother and I used to really tick each other off

SO FAR: 4

(x) Had A Crush On An Older Person -Harrison Ford ;)
(x) Skipped Class
( ) Slept With A Co-worker
(x) Seen Someone / Something Die

SO FAR: 7

(x) Had / Have A Crush On One Of Your Facebook Friends
(x) Been To Paris
(x) Been To Spain
(x) Been On A Plane
(x) Thrown Up From Drinking

SO FAR: 12

(x) Eaten Sushi
( ) Been Snowboarding
( ) Met Someone BECAUSE Of Facebook
( ) Been in a Mosh Pit

SO FAR: 13

( ) Been In An Abusive Relationship
(x) Taken Pain Killers (Tylenol counts)
(x) Love/loved Someone Who You Cant Have
(x) Laid On Your Back And Watched Cloud Shapes Go By
(x) Made A Snow Angel

SO FAR: 17

(x) Had A Tea Party
(x) Flown A Kite
(x) Built A Sand Castle
( ) Gone mudding
(x) Played Dress Up

SO FAR: 21

(x) Jumped Into A Pile Of Leaves
(x) Gone Sledding
(x) Cheated While Playing A Game
(x) Been Lonely
( ) Fallen Asleep At Work / School - I can't! I guess school makes me too nervous to sleep

SO FAR: 25

(x) Watched The Sun Set
(x) Felt An Earthquake - and being in Iowa this is rare! And it was the weirdest sensation!
( ) Killed A Snake

SO FAR: 27

(x) Been Tickled
(x) Been Robbed / Vandalized
(x) Been cheated on
(x) Been Misunderstood

SO FAR: 31

(x) Won A Contest
( ) Been Suspended From School
( ) Had Detention
(x) Been In A Car / Motorcycle Accident

SO FAR: 33

(x) Had / Have Braces
( ) Eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night
(x) Danced in the moonlight

SO FAR : 35

(x) Hated The Way You Look
(x)Witnessed A Crime
(x) Pole Danced
(x) Questioned Your Heart
(x) Been obsessed with post-it-notes

SO FAR: 39

(x) Squished Barefoot Through The Mud
(x) Been Lost
(x) Been To The Opposite Side Of The World - Russia!
(x) Swam In The Ocean
(x) Felt Like You Were Dying

SO FAR: 44

(x) Cried Yourself To Sleep
(x) Played Cops And Robbers
( ) Recently Colored With Crayons / Colored Pencils / Markers - I guess I'm overdue for some coloring time
(x) Sang Karaoke - only if you count Karaoke Revolution!
( ) Paid For A Meal With Only Coins

SO FAR: 47

(x) Done Something You Told Yourself You Wouldn't
(x) Made Prank Phone Calls
(x) Laughed Until Some Kind Of Beverage Came Out Of Your Nose
(x) Kissed In The Rain

SO FAR: 51

(x) Written A Letter To Santa Claus
(x) Watched The Sun Set/ sun rise With Someone You Care/Cared About
(x) Blown Bubbles
(x) Made A Bonfire On The Beach or anywhere

SO FAR: 55

(x) Crashed A Party
(x) Have Traveled More Than 5 Days With A Car Full Of People
(x) Gone Rollerskating / Blading
(x) Had A Wish Come True
(0) Been Humped By A Monkey

SO FAR: 59

(x) Worn Pearls
( ) Jumped Off A Bridge
( ) Screamed "Penis" or "Vagina"
( ) Swam With Dolphins..

SO FAR: 60

( ) Got Your Tongue Stuck To A Pole/Freezer/ice Cube
( ) Kicked A Fish
(x) Worn The Opposite Sex's Clothes
(x) Sat On A Roof Top

SO FAR: 62

(x) Screamed At The Top Of Your Lungs
(x) Done / Attempted A One-Handed Cartwheel
( )Talked On The Phone For More Than 6 Hours
(x) stayed Up for a while talking to someone you care about

SO FAR: 65

( ) Picked And Ate An Apple Right Off The Tree
(x) Climbed A Tree
( ) Had/Been In A Tree House
(x) Been scared To Watch Scary Movies Alone

SO FAR: 67

(x) Believed In Ghosts
(x) Have had More Then 30 Pairs Of Shoes
( ) Gone Streaking
(x) Visited Jail - but only on a school trip!

SO FAR: 70

( ) Played Chicken
( ) Been Pushed into a pool with all your clothes on
( ) Been Told You're Hot By A Complete Stranger
( ) Broken A Bone
(x) Been Easily Amused

SO FAR: 71

(x) Caught A Fish Then Ate It Later
(x) Made A Porn Video/got asked to make one
(x) Caught A Butterfly
(x) Laughed So Hard You Cried
(x) Cried So Hard You Laughed

SO FAR: 76

(x) Mooned/Flashed Someone
(x) Had Someone Moon/Flash You
(x) Cheated On A Test
(x) Forgotten Someone's Name
(x) French Braided Someones Hair
( ) Gone Skinny Dipping
( ) Been Kicked Out Of Your House
( ) Tried to hurt yourself

SO FAR: 81

(x) Rode A Roller Coaster
( ) Went Scuba-Diving/Snorkeling
(x) Had A Cavity
( ) Black-Mailed Someone
( ) Been Black Mailed

SO FAR: 83

(x) Been Used
(x) Fell Going Up The Stairs
( ) Licked A Cat - ew
(x) Bitten Someone
(x) Licked Someone

SO FAR : 87

( ) Been shot at/or at gunpoint
( ) Had sex in the rain - not yet... ;)
( ) Flattened someones tires
(x) Rode in a car/truck until the gas light came on - ALL the time
( ) Got five dollars or less worth of gas

TOTAL: 88

Valentine's Day in the Life of a Single Girl

So it's fast approaching... That day of hearts, and pink, and flowers, and chocolates. And I'm not sure how I feel.

I've never been one of those girls with dates lined up around the corner. In fact during my 26 years I've really only had two boyfriends (and no other dating experiences.) Boyfriend #1 started junior year of high school and ended when we went to separate colleges. We had fun, but I doubt either of us really thought it would work out. Boyfriend #2 did not arrive until senior year of college. Yes, those years between were difficult. Although they were filled with many friendships and fun, there was also a lot of unreciprocated crushing going on. And every year on Valentine's Day, when the message came that I had flowers to pick up I would begin to imagine that they might be from my current crush (even though I knew with 99% certainty that they were from my parents.) But that was okay. Flowers have some magical power to make me feel a certain peace and happiness. And at least I knew someone loved me. I mean not everyone's parents care enough to send flowers.

Then Boyfriend #2 came along. And I'm sure you'll hear more of him in future blogs, but for now I'll just say that we were together for 4 years. At the beginning, it was him chasing me, but in the end I was the one begging him not to leave. Our time together had its ups and downs, but I loved him in spite of his faults and thought he felt the same way. Well it turned out I was wrong. And I've been a single girl for the past 8 months.

8 months... That's a long time. Why haven't I moved on? Well, I have. At least some. I now know that we will never get back together. The haze that comes from being in love is gone, and I can see his faults. Memories of the little incidents that I had brushed off before have returned to remind me that this is for the best. And I've found hope in knowing that I don't have to settle...

Yes, I miss him sometimes. I miss the companionship. I miss the physical relationship. But he is replaceable. And someday that replacement will come. Although the word replacement won't give him justice, because he'll be so much better! And in the meantime I have my friends and family, and best of all I have myself. And I have time to find myself and learn to appreciate myself. Which is what I plan to do this year for Valentine's Day.

Welcome!

Welcome to my new blog! Let me start by answering a few questions you might have...

You: Who is this girl?
Me: A 26 year old single girl living in the wonderful state of Iowa. I'm currently going to grad school (and counting down the years/months/days/seconds until I'm done.) Well, that's a brief description, if you want to learn more you'll have to start following my blog!

You: Well, why are you doing this blog thing?
Me: That's a very good question. But lately I've had a lot on my mind, and I've realized that I have a lot to share with the world! Hopefully, through my blog you will find entertainment, information, and inspiration!

You: Ok, so why'd you pick that title?
Me: I think "No such thing as just your average girl..." portrays my message. I want this blog to represent me, and in a lot of ways I am "just your average girl," but that phrase doesn't define who I am. What is an "average" girl anyway? Aren't we all unique? And then how do you take an average of "unique"?????

Can't wait to share more of me with you!
Any more questions???

Something new...

My first blog post!!!